When the Devas went to Bhagwan Shankar for Samudra Manthan every one knew that Vish would come out first and then the Amrit. This also meant that the good thing would certainly happen once the worse is over.
My inspiration for finding solutions by traveling to the bottom of the problems started with this belief or the manthan.
It is so true, “mountains give way to only those, who have either art of crossing them or courage of breaking them.”
Ever seen a bird flying !!! It swings left and right, as per the flow of wind, to float across the sky. But just notice when it has to scale height, it would always look for reverse wind, why ? The bird knows, if you have to rise in life, the only way is to face tough situations from the front.
Experience is nothing but the amalgamation of tough phases that you experience in life.
We generally suffer from negative thinking. More then the success, our fear is of the failure. Failure in exams, meeting targets, assignments, deadlines, relationships, etc. etc. We shy away from taking strong decisions just for the fear of failure and feel glorified by exaggerating our fears.
A fool said, the more you work, the more you are likely to commit mistake, and the more you are criticized. The less you work, the less you are likely to commit mistake, the more you are appreciated. So why work. This fool never worked and life never worked for him.
The pressure of work and meeting targets does create tension. But you also loose energy and focus by getting into this situation. The burden of tension is like cotton. Till you do not acknowledge it undue, it weighs nothing. But the time you start recognizing it by giving undue importance, you actually start increasing the weight of cotton by nourishing it. It is like watering the cotton - you increase the burden. As its existence increases, it now consumes most of your time and energy. Think logically and rationally. The issue may not be so stressful and it may be wise to look for solutions and not sympathy.
Once you adopt the solution mode, the water in the cotton would dry and you would not even know when this dry cotton would fly away, leaving you tension free and much better focused.
Every problem has a solution, you only need to go to the bottom of the problem. Analyze, what the problem is? From where it got generated ? Were you responsible for it ? Is there a solution ? If yes, what are you waiting for ? And if there is not, look for contingency plans, the other way out.
Remember if you cannot correct it, you can always amend it.
Another area that we suffer is shying away from our mistakes or guilt. We believe, if we can hide our mistakes or guilt, it would never surface. It may not surface to others, but what about your own self. The symptoms start surfacing in your body language and slowly demoralize you emotionally. It is only advisable to share it rather then hide it with some one you are convinced you trust the most. Who knows, the density of mistake or guilt may not be of such magnitude as you may be thinking all along. May be you are not the first and certainly not the last one to commit such mistake. After all, the life has to move on.
I remember a boy who was always smiling. But suddenly his smile despaired. He would sit quietly in a corner and not speak to anyone. His behaviour was no more normal. Slowly he started loosing weight and any one could guess that some thing serious was bothering him.
With some courage I asked him about the matter. But he would not open. Though I was not a stranger but still he needed much more trust to share his issue. After a lot of persuasion and promises, he opened. He had stolen the watch of his brother and sold it to buy a video game. I was stunned. But why this guilt now ? His brother had to appear for 12th class board examination and he needed a watch to check the time. He had noticed the necessity for a watch in his brother’s eyes and how much desperate the need was. He felt ashamed of what he had done. But the mistake had happened.
With some courage I asked him about the matter. But he would not open. Though I was not a stranger but still he needed much more trust to share his issue. After a lot of persuasion and promises, he opened. He had stolen the watch of his brother and sold it to buy a video game. I was stunned. But why this guilt now ? His brother had to appear for 12th class board examination and he needed a watch to check the time. He had noticed the necessity for a watch in his brother’s eyes and how much desperate the need was. He felt ashamed of what he had done. But the mistake had happened.
He did not know what to do. The guilt was now showing its impact.
To me, only solution that I could see was confession of the guilt. “Go and tell your brother everything and apologize for what you have done”, I said. It was difficult for him, but he agreed and finally confessed.
I have always had this strong belief that confession is the simplest way towards coming out of guilt. Confession has the strength of truth and thus it always brings satisfaction and contentment. It releases the negative energy that has been so far keeping you suppressed.
Accept, you may be wrong some time, and the life would be simpler.
Next day, he came to me. I could sense what would have happened, his smile said it all. He confessed to his brother, who did give him a light slap but also hugged him. Slap for hiding this mistake for so long as he was worried where the watch had disappeared. A hug of a brother, that pardoned the mistake and asked him not to be bothered now.
I came to know from his friends that he had stopped spending his pocket money for want of presenting a watch to his brother.
It is also true that everyone passes through tough phases in life. We should never confront the very basic nature of life. Every one has to pass through this phase, as this is how the life has chosen to teach its disciples.
The best way to handle this phase of life is let it pass. You can confront the strong winds but not the storms. The more you resist, the more you increase the length of this phase. The storm is destined to pass, that’s the nature. Again you cannot challenge or fight the nature, no one ever could. Rather bend down, accept, and let it pass in its normal course of period. You would realize that this phase crossed much easier and faster and also without creating much damage.
Life teaches through experience. This is how the life is destined to live.
History has it; no one learned swimming by watching swimmers, you actually need to be in deep waters, to learn.
The life is to live, to live with dignity and pride.
Never surrender, Never say die.